Friday, 7 June 2013
Five Minute Friday: Fall
It is Friday which means it is time to link up with Lisa-Jo Baker for Five Minute Friday again.
The first time I fell was shortly after the birth of my son while we were still in the hospital. The doctors arranged for some additional tests and told us that something was "wrong" with him. The word "surgery" was uttered. That was when the ground opened up and swallowed me. I could not believe my own ears. Were they really talking about my son, this precious baby that had just made its entrance into the world? It just could not be true.
But I fell further. He had jaundice and was taken to the NICU while I was left alone in my hospital room, pumping milk for him, feeling desperate and being surrounded by happy mothers and helpless babies that were tended to the whole day. I felt like my arm had just been amputated without anaesthesia. I spend most of the time crying and those first days of his life in the hospital are nothing but blurred in my memories.
When he finally came back to our room he had problems to drink and I was so afraid to take him home because I was afaid he would starve.
I will never forget how seriously painful these first days were. And although everything eventually became better when we were home these memories are still a sting my heart, marking the beginning of a life that would make us fall over and over again.